GODMOTHER: Dont you think youve already messed her life up enough? And helping, a wannabe princess get her shopping done, our hero headed back to he king's castle for a good nights sleep. Thats the ol' Keeblers place! I shouldve stayed. It follows ogres Shrek and Fiona (Cameron Diaz), now a happily married couple, enjoying their honeymoon.Everything is just fine. Harold is sat between the man and another similar looking man to his other side. He enters the Dragon's Keep. Okay, we're just gonna have a look around. A frog comes crawling out from inside the chestplate. I mean, you expect me to give my blessings to thisthisthing? The son gets a look at the scene and tries to hide back inside. He takes off his hair net and dramatically swishes his hair. Fiona walks out of the room and grabs her suitcase. Well, lets explore that, shall we? I can whinny! Help me, please! SHREK: Look! GODMOTHER: What? Donkeys dont purr. Shrek 2 | Transcripts Fanon Wiki | Fandom in: Incomplete Transcripts, Shrek Movies, DreamWorks Animation Transcripts, and 19 more Shrek 2 Edit Contents 1 Transcript 2 See Also Transcript This transcript isn't tidy! Look at him in his wee little boots. ANNOUNCER: Announcing the long-awaited return of the beautiful Princess Fiona and her new husband! And theres some question as to why that is? The two giggle and Shrek takes her in his arms. Im blind! HAROLD: Ah, yes. PUSS: Hey! FIONA'S BEDROOM. DONKEY: ltll be better in the morning. Shrek picks Puss up by the back of the neck. CHARMING: Fiona, my dearest, if theres one thing I know, its that love is full of surprises. DONKEY: First things first, we need to get you out of those clothes. The show freezes frame on Shrek's face as a knight sprays him with a pepper shaker again. DONKEY: Oh, yeah, that. Bob: Uh huh. Pretend theres nothing wrong! SHREK: Oh, aye! PUSS:I feel a premonition / That girls gonna make me fall, PUSS: Shes into new sensations / New kicks in the candlelight, DONKEY & PUSS: Shes got a new addiction / For every day and night / Shell make you take your clothes off / And go dancing in the rain / Shell make you live her crazy life / But shell take away your pain / Like a bullet to your brain / Upside inside out / Living la vida loca. Donkey: Or Shrek 2: Donkey's Revenge? JEROME: (whispers) Of course. SHREK: The Kingdom of Far, Far Away, Donkey. He opens the door to see Harold standing in the hall. Everyone on the couch sits with their mouths wide open. Its the one, its the onlyits the Fairy Godmother! Godmother flies up into the air, clutching onto the wand. Charming spits out the rose, scoops Fiona in his arms, and leans in for a kiss. BLIND MOUSE: Pardon me, would you mind letting me go? HAROLD: I dont know what came over me. Potions are put onto conveyor belts. And shell never forgive you if you dont. Chemicals are poured into giant vats. Nobody said I have the right to remain silent! GODMOTHER: What in Grimms name are you doing here? Whether your parents like it or not I am an ogre! This time his arms snap off, still holding open the drawbridge, as the rest of Mongo starts falling back into the moat. Off in the distance they see the large kingdom of Far Far Away. Shrek's pants fall down to his ankles. Thats not my husband. I mean, you might find you like this new Shrek. Until the sun went down and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightful enchantment that took hold each and every night. DONKEY: But this is taking forever, Shrek. LILLIAN: I think, Harold, youre taking this a little too personally. Hes gorgeous! CHARMING: (calmly) Oh, about five minutes ago, actually (angrily) after I endured blistering winds! Next to him, the Headless Horseman downs a drink and burps. The crowd gasps. Imtrotting! The three head back out the doors. PUSS: (frightened) Oh, no! Harold and Lillian follow her. Shrek reads the label on the potion. Shrek tips over a giant cauldron, filled with a potion, and the substance spills onto the floor. DONKEY: Shrek! SHREK: Ya know, somehow I dont think I was going to get Daddys blessing even if I did want it! I thought that question was directed at me. But if you come by the office, well be glad to make you a personal appointment. FIONA: Dad says Im going away for a while. With his claws drawn he grabs onto Shrek's leg. A cheering crowd is gathered in front of the palace, filling up the entirety of the square. Shrek: Just eat your goobers and shut your gob, okay? . Head em up, move em on! HAROLD: (starting to reminisce) Our first kiss (snapping out of it) its not the same! Some gender-confused wolf telling him that his princess--. Shes been all moody and stuff latelyso I thought Id move back in with you guys! HAROLD: Ah! LILLIAN: Ugh, you act as if love is totally predictable. Shrek and Puss ride Donkey up the deserted red carpet and toward the front doors of the palace. DONKEY: What? Shrek 2 is a 2004 animated film in which Princess Fiona's parents invite her and Shrek to dinner to celebrate her marriage, not knowing that the newlyweds are both ogres. The water is rancid and the two fish are clearly dead. Just tell me where I can find this ogre. "A tear drop away." Animated Films Wiki. Right. Why is it always midnight? GODMOTHER: You couldnt just go back to your swamp and leave well enough alone. They get closer towards each other and glare into each other's eyes. SHREK: Well, so much for Dads royal blessing. DONKEY: Shes into superstitions / Black cats and voodoo dollssing it, Puss! Rawhide! Shrek notices a set of doors at the other end of the room with a sign above that reads "Potion Room". Donkey opens the door, and Shrek and Fiona look up, puzzled. At the doorway, a metal gate starts to lower down. [clears throat] This is Fairy Godmother. The mice start moving their canes around, unaware that the plate of chicken wings is right next to them. The carriage pulls and stops in front of the red carpet leading to the palace. (hisses). A passenger inside the carriage leans out his head. She hears a voice come from a room to her right. Charming pulls his sword out from its sheath and starts swinging it around. They run happily thru a meadow where an angry mob emerges chasing after them. Shrek puts the hazmat suit on which only manages to cover his head. Come on, join us. How 'bout a side of sugar for the steed? He looks up at a tower that rises above the rest of the castle, a light shining from its window. In his surprise, Shrek drops Fiona to floor. Prince Charming comes bursting through the doors behind her. Fiona sighs as Shrek and Harold continue to rip apart their food, sending bits and pieces flying across the table. Narrator: After a long day of saving fried chicken, stopping an inner-city riot. Aladdin and the King of Thieves/Transcript. You workin' that hat! Youd be surprised how much I changed for your mother. You have engaged my valuable servicesyour Majesty. Harold walks up to a door in the back and sees Fairy Godmother's men from before standing guard. DONKEY: Uno, dos, quatro, hit it! My one chance to fix things up with Fionas dad, and I end up lost in the woods with you! But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. DONKEY: Thats more like it! CHARMING: It was he who would chance the perilous journey through blistering cold and scorching desert traveling for many days and nights, risking life and limb to reach the Dragons Keep. Shrek grabs onto one the arms and Gingy jumps back down to Mongo. Harold scowls, Lillian is apprehensive, and Fiona cringes. Donkey sighs. But hew wasn't he was just unique. Charming takes off his helmet, revealing himself to be the narrator's voice. Chains dangle from the ceiling which attach to their shackles, keeping them suspended above the floor. German Wikipedia. HAROLD: Uh, darling. GODMOTHER: What? Shrek the Third (also known as Shrek 3) is a 2007 American computer-animated comedy film loosely based on the 1990 children's picture book Shrek! His life is interrupted after the dwarfish Lord Farquaad of Duloc exiles a vast number of fairy-tale creatures, who inadvertently end up in the swamp. PUSS: On my honor, I am obliged to accompany you until I have saved your life as you have spared me mine. Im your Fairy Godmother. The dance floor is empty, except for Shrek and Fiona still slow dancing. And if you think that Ill be smearing VapoRub all over your chest, think again! SHREK: Tell her, Shrek--Im her husband, Shrek! 7561111-9. But inside youre the still same old, mean, salty. Donkey sprints off, leaving Puss muttering angrily in Spanish. It is loosely based on William Steig's 1990 fairy tale picture book Shrek!, and somewhat serves as a parody film, targeting other films adapted . Donkey: And before they knew it, they were hitched. The bouquet was delicious. Now, where were we? SHREK: Thanks, but weve got all the happiness we need. HAROLD: Darling? A man walks up to the horses and cleans them off, and the carriage driver tosses him a coin. HAROLD: I mean, It wasnt my fault. Shrek and Fiona hold each other's hands as they are engulfed in a magical aura and float into the air. Make yourself useful and go keep watch. Come on! Two knights restrain him with an animal capture device and one lifts a dime bag off of him. Harold and Lillian look on, surprised. Tell the truth, will I ever play the violin again? Exquisite. He opens it, and Fiona's voice reads it in his head. She braces herself and Donkey makes the popping noise again. SHREK: Are you feeling at all degraded or oppressed? Withjusta. Yeah! HAROLD: (clears his throat) Um, excuse me? Mongo is still fully submerged under the water. DONKEY: Oh yeah, right, Im sure a nice BM is the perfect solution for marital problems! Lets just back away slowly. DONKEY: Oh, sweet sister, mother of mercy. Charming hugs Fiona, who hesitantly obliges him. Charming uses his bow to shoot a roped arrow to a wooden post on the other side and uses it as a zipline. Look at what hes done to you. Hes with us. Fiona looks at Charming with surprise, and then with affection. Cars 2 is a 2011 American computer-animated film produced by Pixar Animation Studios and distributed by Walt Disney Pictures, and is the sequel to the 2006 film, Cars. Harold stands unsure, still clutching the axe, staring out at the moon. Unless, of course, I can't find you or if I forget. GODMOTHER: Oh-ho-ho! Shrek gets caught a trap and villagers surround Fiona, who fends them off. Woo! DONKEY: Hey, Shrek. CHARMING: Im just playing the part, Fiona. GODMOTHER: Late at night I toss and I turn / And I dream of what I needHit it! View source History Talk (0) Shrek 2 is a transcript. I hope youre happy. Your friend Charlie. Move 'em on! Shrek looks out the window, seeing the Far Far Away Palace. DONKEY: I say we take the sword and neuter him right here. And dont worry, they're gonna love you too. Godmother hovers over to wall of bookshelves filled with books. With an annoyed look on his face, Donkey follows them. Know what Im saying? Someday, I will repay you! Weve got company! Stop them! He will rue the very day he stole my kingdom from me! A carriage is traveling on a road through the forest. imported from Wikimedia project. Fiona runs outside and down the stairs, not recognizing Donkey in his new form. Library of Congress authority ID. Shrek cautiously waves at an angry mob, who to his surprise, smile and wave back at him. You see, II need to have someone taken care of. Thats not about to change. To his sides sits Lillian and Fiona, and across from him sits Harold. I just I just wish I could make her happy. SHREK: And guess what, princess? A figure jumps down onto the path in front of them. That's a good question. She tosses the book to the ground and pulls out another. DONKEY: Hey, you were the one who said you didn't want to stop and get directions. Shrek gestures to piles of mail stacked on a stool and potted plants that have withered away. He has a face that looks like it was carved by angels. She drops the wand and another pig grabs it and runs. Now I need their blessing? Coming! Godmother smiles. CHARMING: Ah--do you think so? Shrek gets out of bed and looks out the window and stares at the Far Far Away sign. Larry: Aw, I forgive . The pig lands on the table with a thud. I got to get a job. Gingy takes the key and runs across Pinocchio's nose as it continues to grow with each denial. Well, heres to us, Fiona. SHREK: Well, theres some fine print for you! It includes four computer-animated films . The music stops and Fiona's fancy dress turns to dust. Sorry! You know, after your little spat last night. Shrek Forever After Act l Goodnight Junior Shrek Forever After Act ll Closing Countertop (Fade back to Bob and Larry on the countertop) Bob: I feel like I always say this, but wow, Larry, that was great! SHREK: "Happiness." What? There you are. They continue to dance. Shrek 2/Transcript < Shrek 2 View src Transcript Prince Charming: Once upon a time in a kingdom far far away, the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. FURNITURE: The kind of girl a prince would date! And throughout the land, everyone was happy. (sighs) Maybe Fiona wouldve been better off if I were some sort of Prince Charming. GODMOTHER: Oh, yes, you will. The film is released by DreamWorks Animation and is distributed by Paramount Pictures. JEROME: The Fairy Godmother. SHREK: Its a cat, Donkey. Weve got a big order to fill! Just the old crusade wound playing up a bit! They can hear the Godmother behind it as well as the source of the flashes. He climbs to the highest bloody room of the tallest bloody tower! Thanks for waiting. Charming pulls Fiona in closer, who is still looking at him with suspicion. Think of the saddest thing thats ever happened to you. I just wish I could be the man you deserve. Youre not her father! DONKEY: Oh come on, Shrek, dont feel bad. SHREK: Hold on! No! Donkey hurries down the stairs and Shrek jumps off his back. Godmother turns into bubbles for her death. I know youre feeling bad, but you gotta let your own--. Im looking for the Ugly Stepsister. JEROME: Pardon. Dont you, honey? Harold tries to hide his identity with his cloak and walks over to the bar. You got a puppy? DONKEY: Hey! There are more Shrek movies to follow according to Jeffrey Katzenberg. LILLAN: Its so nice to have the family together for dinner. Fireworks go off in the evening sky. FIONA: But its the old one I fell in love with, Dad. Fiona looks back and gives Harold a confused look before Charming nudges her closer. SHREK: Oh, will you look at the time! DONKEY: Whoa, whoa, whoa now. PUSS: Thats the Fairy Godmothers cottage. Oh, I should lighten up?! SHREK: Thank you, gentlemen! CHARMING: Once upon a time in a kingdom far far away, the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. Help; in: Transcripts, DreamWorks Transcripts, Shrek Transcripts. Oh! Donkey jumps into the carriage and the driver starts riding off. See, youre allergic to that stuff. Harold is pouring tea into two cups on a tray. imported from Wikimedia project. I need to go, anyway. GODMOTHER: Charming. (dances around) La, di, da, di, da, di da! And my father lives off the garbage! Shrek smiles. They just want to give you their blessing. Oh I do believe we can make this work to our advantage. PUSS: Take off the powdered wig and step away from your drawers! The workers are all elves wearing white hazmat suits. Dont tell me you dont know who I am. GODMOTHER: Banish your blemishes, tooth decay / Cellulite thighs will fade away! SHREK: It says, "Beauty Divine." Shrek stands nervously. Yeah, Imma keep watch. But not the way I feel about you. Anastasia (1997)/Transcript. Lillian walks off, and Harold follows after lingering for a few moments. But theyre my parents, Shrek. DONKEY: Uh why dont you guys go ahead? Shrek passes out and falls down. Donkey runs over to a bush in the shape of a busty figure. SHREK: Now lets go before they light the torches. But Shrek had this thing he had to do and uh--. A worker pushing a cart walks by the janitor's closet. I told you coming here was a bad idea. Just as Charming takes Fiona's hand, Harold and Lillian come walking in. Shrek looks uneasy as people in the streets stop and stare. DONKEY: Lighten up? SHREK: Thatll have to do. Shrek sniffs the potion and sneezes mucus onto a mushroom. Shrek and Godmother chase after the wand. Shrek looks out from the barn, solemnly starting at Far Far Away way off in the distance. SHREK: What? Later, the potion has dried up and Fairy Godmother shouts at the doves. The pig grabs onto Godmother's leg and she tries to shake him off. It opens, and a voice turns the pages and reads it. Well This isnt a good time, pumpkin. PUSS: Boss! Is there anything I can do for you? A small puppy lands in Fiona's hands. Of course, not! Can I get a "whoop-whoop"? The carriage takes off. I need to do Charmings hair before the ball. Hey, mice, pass me a buffalo wing. Youre supposed to say, I have the right to remain silent.! The room is completely dark, except for the moonlight shining through a window. I dont think you realize that our daughter has married a monster! Hes hopeless. Mongo, Shrek, and Gingy approach the walls surrounding the palace. The music comes to a halt. The group cheers. VIAF ID. He walks through the factory floor pushing the cart. Look at the pony! Move em on! GODMOTHER: [singing] Your fallen tears have called to me / So, here comes my sweet remedy / I know what every princess needs / For her to live life happily. DONKEY: Boom! Thick, wavy locks? GINGY: Well, folks, it looks like were up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick. Gingy eventually reaches Shrek and uses the key to free Shrek, Donkey, and Puss. Posed similarly, Puss runs over to Shrek and Donkey's unconscious bodies. Women can be heard whispering. DONKEY: I know, I know! SHREK: Or maybe Fiona and I were never meant to be. [laughs] And just a hint oflust! He is wearing noble clothes that somewhat resemble Shrek's usual getup. Fiona looks uncomfortably at the crowd who are all chanting "Dance! You should ask your father. Thieves! Shrek 2 is a transcript. Two women take note of their carriage and start following it. Up one floor from Fiona's room, Harold stands at a balcony. NARRATOR: Will they get away with it? HAROLD: Im sorry, Lillian. They locked you in a tower! (laughing) I know you aint talking about the swamp! It opens, and a voice turns the pages and reads it. Godmother gestures to the window and steps aside. FIONA: Ugh! SHREK: Hello? They bore me to tears. They pass by a waterfall and over a bridge. Fiona drags the mermaid by the tail, and throws her into the sea into a group of sharks. I hope Im not interrupting anything. Especially us talking ones. SHREK: I was, but I cant let them do this to Fiona! Then they got all drunk and start beating me with a stick going, "Piata! GODMOTHER: Oh I beg to differ. Someone is looking at Shrek and Donkey from up in a tree. And it was destiny that his kiss CHARMING: would break the dreaded curse. Doris walks up to Charming and tries to kiss him. Fiona leans against the window and looks out. Come here. Shrek 2/Home media | Fanon Kingdom Wiki | Fandom in: Home media, Shrek 2, Shrek Shrek 2/Home media View source General Trivia Gallery Soundtrack Quotes Transcript Trailer transcripts Credits Home media Home video releases of Shrek 2 . Im Im. I hope Im not interrupting, but Im told youre the one to talk to about anogre problem? An announcer pulls out a scroll and reads it aloud. They wait for Pinocchio's nose to grow but nothing happens. Mom and Dad approve, and Fiona gets the man shes always dreamed of. Then pops again. GODMOTHER: Mummy can handle this.. (continuing her son's rant) He endures blistering winds and scorching desert! Look whos finally coming around! He takes off his hat and sheathes his sword. SHREK: Look. Oh! Angered by the intrusion, Shrek decides to visit Farquaad and demand they be moved elsewhere. GODMOTHER: Oh! Pah! SHREK: But look at me. Shrek puts the toy back and then looks over at a small chest on a table in the corner of the room. 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